Thursday, May 6, 2010

Surviving is Not Enough

Having 3 kid under 2 absolutely requires a sense of humor, and I say things at times that may be seen as a joke, but in reality, I am quite serious. For instance, when people ask how I do it, I often say that my only goal each day is to make sure that everyone survives. People laugh, and I say oh, I'm kidding, but really, that has been pretty much my main objective. I have given up on dreams of pureeing organic baby food, hell, I've given up on my kids to wear matching clothes to daycare. And I'm okay with sacrificing the illusions I had once upon a time of all the ideal things I would do as a mom.

However, somewhere you have to draw the line of how much you can sacrifice. Last night my mom said something that made me think. She told me that she is losing sleep at night worrying about my kids. Now, don't take that the wrong way, she assured me that this is no reflection on my parenting or an inadequacy on my part. Just that having to divide my time three ways is challenging, and are they all getting everything they need? Believe me, I have asked myself this very question a thousand times. I have finally realized that the answer is an unequivocal no. No, they are not. It is not enough to ensure survival. I must find time to nurture them each individually. So, now what do I do?

Rest assured, I do have a plan. And as anyone who knows me well would assume the plan involves an Excel spreadsheet. Introducing my new one on one time calendar:



So, basically, here is my idea, on the nights were Scott has 1:1 time scheduled with one of the kids, I will have the other two and vice versa. I will try to plan things for us to do, like go to the park, or Barnes and Noble or even just a trip to Target. Anything, just do it alone with that child, even if it's just an hour. And

I realize that Leah is not on here, she gets one on one time during feedings, and after the boys are in bed. Also, if one of the boys is gone on 1:1 time it is a lot easier to give both of the remaining kids extra attention, so she will be fine. Don't worry, my little princess will get plenty of lovin.

So, sleep tight tonight Mom, the kids are going to be fine – I am going to make sure of that.

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